A League of My Own

It's the first day of April. And you know what that means...

it's about time for baseball.

My most favorite time of year! Woo Hoo!

(ahem....um....April Fool's...!)

If you know me at all...you know that baseball season is not a huge priority for me. I have tried to pay enough attention to the sport to show my friends that I care...but I still struggle when it comes to actually playing the game.

Here....I'll give ya a 'fer instance'.

I believe it was in the springtime of my sophomore year of high school...I had just dressed for gym class...and we were headed outside. To play some baseball. Only for us girls...it's called softball. Oh, they want you to think that there's a difference...and there is! The BALL IS BIGGER! Still hurts just as much when it bounces up into your face, folks...there's no difference there....!

But I digress...that's not the point of this story.

So, my team is batting. I'm standing there in a line with the other gals next to the fence and I'm trying to pay attention, but it's tough. I had an English paper to think about...and band...and Robby Reber...and driving. Softball was probably the furthest thing from my mind.

But then it's my turn to bat.

In my five years of 'serious' gym class...I'd batted maybe...five times. Total.

Not my favorite thing to do at all.

I don't know if my being left handed had anything to do with it or what...but I usually struck out. I figured that today would be no different.

However, I surprised myself by actually hitting the ball! On the first try!

I stood there...in amazement.

The girls on my team started yelling at me. "Run! Go to first base! Go!"

Words I'd never heard before.

Suddenly I found myself trying to recall the rules of baseball...run to first base...just get to first, C.

I start running towards a girl that I think is the first baseman. And my teammates begin screaming at me.

"That's not it! Go back!"

In the meantime...amidst all this excitement...the girls on the other team are getting the ball and are throwing it to each other bringing it closer to me with each toss. I am frantic now...searching for the base. WHERE IS IT?

As I'm trotting back and forth between these two gals, searching for the base...one tags me with the softball and Mrs. M., the p.e. teacher, hollers that I'm out.

I walk off the diamond. I want to cry.

(I didn't know then that there's no crying in baseball!)

As I walk past Mrs. M. she's chuckling. "Oh Carrie! You're so funny! Where were you going?"

"I was trying to get to first." I say.

"You were clear over by second! Where did you think it was?"

"Well the grass is way too tall! They need to mow." I said. I go sit down in that tall grass and consider how much I really hate p.e. And baseball. And being out.

Being out is the worst.

The game continues on and I find myself eventually holding the bat in my hand again. Sigh. Maybe this time I'll strike out. C'mon...throw the ball and let's get this pain over with quickly, I think.

This girl Bonnie pitches the ball and I do something I have never done in my life.

I hit the ball with the bat for the SECOND TIME!

I hesitate for a moment. Watching where the ball goes. If they catch it, I'm out. But this time will be different! This time I know where first base is! I run at my top speed (which isn't really very fast) towards the base.

As I'm about to touch it, the girl on first gets the ball. My foot comes down a split second before she touches my arm with it.

"SAFE!" I hear Mrs. M. call out.

I realize that I haven't taken a breath in like...what seems....15 minutes.

I exhale. The relief I feel coursing through my body is incredible. I'm on first base! It's amazing here! The grass is greener! The air smells sweeter!

I grin at the gal near me. "Good job," she says.

"Thanks." I say. "Um...Sandy?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's second base?"

She rolls her eyes at me and points in the general direction.

I nod. I was SAFE! Do you understand how incredible that is!?

Safe.

I experienced that same feeling yesterday. I had spent most of my day dejectedly feeling 'out'...feeling uncoordinated, untalented...misunderstanding the whole game of life. I felt like I was letting my teammates down because I wasn't 'playing the game well'...I felt miserable.

But I got a call late in the day from someone that helped turn that around. A close friend, who...with a few words...reminded me that I'm safe.

Reminded me that even when I'm not playing my "A game"...that I am still a valuable teammate.

Reminded me that it is so important to make myself vulnerable enough to someone that they know me...really know me well...and still like having me around.

Those relationships are not simple...or easy to come by. They can take a lot of time to develop and grow.

But they are sooooooo worth it.

I am very grateful for my friends. I appreciate them more than they could ever imagine. In my game of softball with them....I am safe. Never out.

(Which is totally different than the game of softball I played in 1984. Sigh. I never did make it to second base...Lisa Anderson caught the next hit and then it was time to go inside.)

Ah well....like those Cubs fans say, "There's always next year!"

Remember to tell a friend how much you care about them today....