Indulge me....just don't overdo it!

Recently I've been watching a lot of television.

I know this because the other day I woke up and tried to start the coffee maker with the DVD player remote. I also used it to try and fast forward through the argument my kids were having over whose turn it was to "find the tv show listings for Mom" and whose turn it was to "move her to the other side of the couch so the cushions wear evenly".

Another more obvious clue was my poor attempt at trying to fit a 52" tv into a 42" bathroom because I didn't want to miss the season premiere of that new show with whatshername in it.

Now, before you judge me, I have to admit that some of my viewing has been very educational. I've learned how to make my own mustard from a French Chef (well, it looked like mustard. I kind of had a hard time understanding what he was calling it); I can easily identify Mammoth tusks at an archeological dig in Alaska (you know, if I'm ever there!); and I can now tuck point the basement of this old house of mine (although I believe we've already had that done. Maybe I should check with my husband.).

Some of my viewing has been entertaining. I laughed myself silly through an 80's sitcom, an Italian opera, and the weather report. That was some funny stuff right there.

On the other hand, I've also been less than entertained by a lot of the shows I've been watching. Just last week I watched thirteen movies from the 70's that starred Lindsay Wagner, forty five infomercials on weightloss, and twenty seven reality shows.

The good news, however, is that I've spent less time on the computer.

Why is it so easy to over indulge? (A phrase, by the way, I learned from one of those commercials!) I'm not sure I understand why I don't find myself wanting to make my bed over and over...yet I'm willing to sit and watch an NCIS marathon even though I've seen every episode at least twice already!

My husband has a similar problem. The man can do all kinds of mathematical functions and figurings. He measures things and counts things. Multiplies and divides. Until he gets to the grocery store and faces his own Kryptonite. A "five items for $5" sale.

He's come home with sixty seven boxes of spaghetti, three boxes of cereal that no one eats, twenty two boxes of sandwich baggies and yet still can't remember to get the milk I asked for in the first place!

"You know," I say to him, "You don't HAVE to buy five to get the sale price on one item."

"It was a good deal!" he'll respond. We ate pasta for fifty two days straight. The cereal is still sitting in the pantry. The good news there? It's all been separated into individual baggies.

My friends, I propose that this week will be different. I am going to watch less television, make my bed once a day, and send my teenagers to the grocery store.

After all, they know what kind of cereal I like!

I encourage you to consider the things that you're over indulging on in your life and how you might live with less.

Thanks for reading!

The Nature of Things

Look, I'll be honest. When it comes to nature, I love it. I enjoy being out in it...seeing it's beauty. Smelling the flowers, feeling the warm air.

I'm all for it.

But...and this is a big BUT...

the bugs need to stay outside. You know, where nature is.

That's my rule. If I find one of you critters in my house...well, I can't say for sure that you will live to see the next showing of Ants on HBO.

A couple of days ago, however, I realized that I needed to amend my rule. Add on to it. Make sure that the bugs understand exactly what I'm talking about when I say, "MY HOUSE".

Goes a little something like this:

The party of the first part (that being me) informs the party of the second part (that being bugs) that when the term 'house' or 'home' is mentioned by the party of the first part, she is, in fact, stating the entire property...inside and out. Please make a note of this. Thank you.
A couple of days ago, I noticed these flying insects (about 20 or so of them) hovering low to the ground. They reminded me of bees at first...but I couldn't get a really good look at them. They were in the area where the dogs go out to 'do their business'. I wondered if perhaps they were flies (because of the 'area' in which they were flying around)...but as I said, I couldn't get them to sit still long enough to get a good look at them. I stuck to my thought of bees (or perhaps hornets?) and was concerned that there might be a hive under our deck.

I've seen horrible pictures of these huge ol' hives in bbq grills and yes, under decks. I didn't want my deck to be the next forwarded email sensation.

In a fit of bravado, later in the day, I went outside and didn't see them. I wondered about the hive again and stomped the whole area of the deck...ready to run into the house as soon as I needed to...nothing happened.

The next day...there they were...same bat time...same bat channel. They didn't seem to be bothering the dogs and were, as I mentioned, just kinda flying around low and hovering.

I told my husband about them. After all, bugs are in his job description. I handle the laundry...he takes care of the creepy crawlies. He suggested that perhaps they were ground wasps. I googled ground wasps and found out some info on the web about them.

1) Also called 'cicada killers'. (which sounds very dramatic to me! A movie title of a grand sort! Can't you hear that 'movie guy' doing the trailer for it?)

2) Very practical insects. They help the environment and all. (Yeah, okay...but they still have stingers, right?)

3) Info on the potential nest. A small round hole in the ground. With some dirt kicked up around the area.

Hm...very interesting. While I didn't see any pictures 'exactly' like my bug...I did see enough similarities to think that perhaps this was what we had 'moving in'.

Sunday came and my daughter and I spied them after returning home from church. She stepped on two of them in 'mid-hover' and killed them. Thus supplying us with a closer look. Yeah, they kinda do look like ground wasps.

So...I told Steve that we needed to find the nest and get rid of them. I didn't want the kids or the dogs to be stung by one. Wasps don't play around when they sting. And, unlike their 'cousin' the bee...don't have the decency to die after they sting you. No...they just keep on doing it.

That's when I realized I needed the amendment, you see. After all, I make the house payments on this property. And until I see some cash on my doorstep from those 'cicada killers'...well, they need to re-locate.

Steve poured gasoline into the hole he found yesterday. Stuck a rag in there.

Now we wait and see if that did the trick.

We'll show you who's in control!!

Yep. Feeling pretty large and in charge...that's me. When you google me, you'll find "QUEEN KILLER OF THE CICADA KILLERS!!"

(well, actually it was technically Steve. And Hannah killed two...but hey! Who's writing this??)

I love feeling like I'm in control. It's powerful. It's giddy at times, isn't it? That feeling of 'nothing can stop me!' Not a hovering little wasp-y thing that helps the environment but has tragically picked a bad place to raise a family...not ANYTHING!! (Now I hear the Rocky theme playing in my head...)

Well, this morning I went for a walk up Catfishhead Road. (That's what we named the road. It's a long story...maybe for another time.) It's a little access road that runs next to our defunct railroad tracks.

Well, it was foggy this morning. And very dewy.

As I walked, I noticed in the tall grass there between the road and the railroad tracks...spider webs.

Hundreds of them! I mean, I know that there are a lot of spiders out there...but wow! I had no idea that many of them were lurking in the fields!!!

Just garden spiders. Nothing dangerous. In fact, I think that as spiders go, they're very pretty to see. I just wasn't prepared for a party that size!!

And it was about halfway down the road that I realized something.

I really have very little control over things. I mean, I may be able to kill out one gaggle (hoard, herd, family?) of wasps...but that's about it.

It's humbling. And a little scary. Isn't it?

I mean, I don't know about you, my friend...but I don't always enjoy the feeling of NOT being in control.

The good news is: I know that Someone Else has things well under control.

I find that comforting. Hope you do too!

Thanks for reading!